Myocardial Infarction

Tonight, a lovely guest post on which we can all ponder over and reflect…

Almost everything I have ever started, I had a solid idea and plan of what I was going to accomplish…and that applied to virtually everything.

So when I came to Rutgers, I had a game plan. But then things never do go as you intend them to, right?

It’s a scary thing to realize halfway through a journey, that you forgot your destination. Whatever you were working towards is in reality not what you had in mind. You forgot what your intentions were. For the brief second, you shake loose Shaytan’s grip on you, reality hits you so hard in the face, you lose your breath and feel like your heart might explode.

So you collapse. But do you give up? No. Instead you start to think…what am I doing? Do I want this? Why do I want this? Should I even want this? Where do I go from here? Everything and anything runs through your mind, leaving it all twisted.

Why talk about this? Well. It’s because we all go through this. We were made imperfect so we could make mistakes and seek the forgiveness of the Most Merciful.

A reminder for us all: we need to have one intention and that is, please our Creator to the full extent that we can. I know this is repeated at almost every Khutbah, but not many are blessed to FEEL this message.

There is a very well known quote from Ali radiAllahu anhu:

“Oh, Allah, when I lose my hopes and plans, help me remember that Your love for me is greater than my disappointments, and Your plans for me are better than my dreams.”

In such few words, Ali radiAllahu anhu delivered such a profound message that sometimes is not only hard but almost impossible for us to believe. We feel as if we have no room in our hearts or time in our lives to do so. But He, subhanahu wa ta’ala, warned us over and over about the consequence of believing we don’t have time.

قَالَ كَذَٰلِكَ أَتَتْكَ آيَاتُنَا فَنَسِيتَهَا ۖ وَكَذَٰلِكَ الْيَوْمَ تُنسَىٰ

“Did Our signs come to you, and you forgot them; and thus will you this Day be forgotten.” [Qur’an 20:126]

Wouldn’t you rather be loved by the All-Mighty than the ones who rely on His Might? The answer should be yes. But why is it so difficult to just be satisfied with the love of God?

I have a reflection on this too (I think too much as you can tell). When we begin to seek approval, love, and belonging amongst the creation, we can find it easily. Our society is structured so that we may find it easily. When we are loved or wanted, the feelings that overcome us are typical. You feel happy…but what happens with time?

That feeling of belonging slowly starts to fade, your decisions don’t seem as good, everything begins to darken including your heart. And this is when you think…what was I doing? What was my intention?

If the intention was to please Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala and seek His approval, the love and happiness would only grow day by day. You’d feel indescribable. Because His love and approval are what we were MADE to seek. That is our purpose. And when you lose focus of your purpose, forget your intent, and become lost, you end up attaining something you never wanted.

So what do you do to find this intention and let go of whatever idea you are holding on to?

  1. Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala has given us free will. WE must go out and self reflect and find what ties us down to this dunya wrongly.
  2. Let it go. Whatever misconception you have about anything and anyone. In order to make room in your heart for Him, it can’t be full of clutter. Don’t be a hoarder.
  3. Read as much Qur’an and pray as much (and on time) as you can. If you want the approval of someone (like a boss), you’d always get to a meeting you’ve schedule with him/her on time…so why delay the five most important meetings of your daily life?
  4. Never ever ever ever ever think you are not good enough. If in this world, and especially in college you feel as if you are judged, talked about, and misunderstood that means nothing. We are not capable of seeing beyond what our minds want to see…but He is all-Knowing. If He Himself states, “Allah will bring a people whom he loves and who love Him…” [Qur’an 5:54], then no rejection of any sort should make you sad.
  5. Try your best to see the best in people. Try it out, give them a chance—even if you are scared and not sure. You can’t possibly seek the pleasure of Allah subhanahu wa ta’ala while being preoccupied doing the opposite of these things.

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